My friend Stu

With one week of delayed work upon my back, dust is finally settling down. It took me only a couple of days out of a perfect routine to exorcise some of my demons out and to get the rest of 'em upset. Fortunately the exorcism occurred, of course, at nigh, so no one noticed and thus there was no talking about it. After that, the mayhem and chaos continued until today at noon, but things changed somehow and I actually enjoyed it. I am seeing things with different eyes now (blurry and red too).

I have tons of pending work from a job where I don't get paid (at least not with money), I'm officially broke as in totally broke, I'm incredibly tired and I'm finally willing to accept that I'm not going to New York. Despite all of this, I'm feeling somehow good. Perhaps it's the "joy of the mediocre" but it's O.K. I'm O.K. with it now. As I used to do with people and I do now with life, I'm beginning to drop all expectations about my own self. From now on, everything will be an achievement. For example: If I manage to wake up in the morning, I'll congratulate my self for the success. If I get a shirt ironed I'll say "Dude, you rock!” If I cook some eggs for breakfast I'll go further and say to me "Man, you are a delightful gentleman" while I use the proper fork for the omelette after having some fruit. The utter goal is to make people around me go the same way. Have you noticed how stupid people have it all easy? If you're stupid and get something done, everyone will clap at you; but if you're smart and get something amazing done, (if they ever notice) they'll say "Yes, normal stuff for him. Who cares? He's got it all easy on him because he's intelligent. Let's go with Stupid, he's so awesome. I heard he's getting a promotion".

I used to hate Stu, now I look up to him. He's so awesome...